“When you develop a belief that in every adversity there is the seed of an equal or greater benefit, you cannot help but learn from the experience and be hopeful for the future.”

Blame doesn’t really get us anywhere. What does is taking responsibility for our lives.
The key: it is not the difficult situation or the roadblocks that must be changed but the way we view the roadblocks.
The point is not to find who is at fault but rather to find out one thing I can do to make something work. Taking 100% responsibility for our lives.
“People usually want the results guaranteed before they make the commitment. But unless you make the commitment to get the goal you’ll always be stuck with the roadblocks and impossibilities…so what you do is listen to all the impossibilities play through in your head and when they start to diminish a bit you get on with finding ways of making it happen. I still don’t believe I can do it, but that has nothing to do with it. I’m making every effort.” (Martin Rutte, lifestyle management consultant)
The difference with this approach and positive thinking is the way we approach a negative belief. With positive thinking, you try to ignore it.
But that’s an impossible task when you make big goals beyond reasonable expectations. The roadblocks and barriers are larger than the individual.
“The key is to acknowledge these barriers, our beliefs, and move around them or shift the emphasis.” (M.R.)
You have your negative beliefs and you also are responsible for getting the results because you are committed to attaining them!
This is a very powerful force and a whole new way of thinking and living. Taking responsibility is tremendously empowering.

Decide what you want

Write it on a piece of paper

Read it aloud morning and night

Be ‘ready’ to receive what you want. This is not about wishing.

Believe it will happen. Mix this thought with emotion and feeling.

Make it real. Visualize attaining the result.

Tim Tarango, NLP specialist, sent me 5 classic quotes I want to share with you today. I think you will find them as inspiring as I did.

“All that we are is the result of what we have thought.
The mind is everything. What we think we become.” ~ The Buddha

“The mind moves in the direction of our currently dominating thought.” ~Earl Nightingale

“There are no limitations to the mind except those we acknowledge; both poverty and riches are the offspring of thought.”

Napoleon Hill
Author of Think and Grow Rich

Here are some great techniques to sabotage your success!

• Have no clear sense of direction or clarity and you don’t know what you want.
• No motivation. Motivation is what makes you want to get up in the morning. It comes from desires and needs. Fear can be a good motivator sometimes when you use it in a resourceful way.
• Not wanting responsibilities. If your dream comes with a lot of responsibility, you may not want this, so develop a dream that is realistic and meaningful for you.
• Fear of success. Yes, some individuals feel undeserving of success and can’t handle it when it comes along. Perhaps you subconsciously fear it may change what you have presently or your relationships. To overcome this feeling is to become successful in another area of your life. Allow yourself to win. Success can become addictive.
• Fear of failure. But then if we don’t fail, then that’s probably because we haven’t done anything. Let yourself fail. Often. That’s the way we learn and  grow. Some people say there is no such thing as failure…only feedback. It is the environment’s way of telling us we haven’t quite got it right, yet , but to continue trying.

So, what to do with our sabotage techniques?

• Honestly evaluate what they are. List them.
• Replace them with positive empowering thoughts and action that will bring you closer to your goals.  Remember that great truth: “What you focus on, is what you’ll get.”
• Get a partner who respects and admires you to help you stay motivated and on track.
• Reinforce powerful beliefs and visualize yourself succeeding.

Now that we’ve all decided that this is as good a time as any for a recession (‘What you focus on is what you get’), here are some tips for transforming our old way of life:

• Cut back on useless expensive items and cook dinner for your friends, get them a nice bottle of wine or beautiful flowers
• Spend more time with family and friends. Go for a walk, spend some time catching up or writing to old acquaintances. Rekindle friendships.
• Take the time to live in the moment. Contemplate a sunset; go to a botanical gardens and smell the flowers; make the best of those moments; savor time and the people around you; volunteer at a hospital or go spend time with individuals who need attention and affection. Get a dog or cat and learn from them.
• Join a group; a dance class; get involved helping others. Helping others, dixit the science of positive psychology is THE answer to everything and a shortcut to happiness.
• Now is a good time to do something different or new. When is the last time you’ve done something for the VERY FIRST TIME? Now, is the time to do it again and reap the joy. Leave your comfort zone behind…Create that new vision for yourself and your environment.
• Focus on prosperity and wealth…and encourage others to do the same thing. You’ll soon see the recession recede. I promise.

It’s all about circuitry. You can decide whether you want to run that program or another…If you think ’sad’, this will create a physiological response in your body. But you could decide not to run that circuitry anymore. Your brain is cells. You have the ability to focus your mind on what you want to focus it on. The past doesn’t have to have any power over you. So when you don’t think about it anymore, (i.e. empower your circuitry), it doesn’t exist. When you pay attention to what’s going on in your own brain, you take responsibility for the circuitry you are running, you make the rules of a new game! It’s beautiful. It’s freedom.

So let go of all the old baggage. Make a clean slate for yourself. Choose what you want. Own your own power. Take responsibility for your circuitry!

I experienced and ‘got’ this because I had a stroke and I lost my thinking side (left) for quite a while. You can ‘get’ this without having a stroke. Pay attention to what you are thinking. You are not your thoughts. They are created by a tiny group of cells the size of a peanut. Don’t let this left hemisphere rule your life. Yes, the mind’s job is to keep you safe in the external world but you are not your thoughts. So, pay attention to what you are thinking and decide if those are the thoughts that will create the kind of life that you want. It’s really that easy. Learn to silence the brain chatter and to focus your mind on something else. Allow yourself to move to the circuitry that will provide peace and happiness.

(Summary of an radio interview given by Jill Bolte Taylor, Ph.D. It is the story of a brain scientist who suffered a severe stroke.)

My Stroke of Insight/ISBN 978-0-670-02074-4

Forget about your age. Don’t worry about statistics.

Surround yourself with friends who are fun and who make you laugh. Jettison the deadbeats in your life. Laugh a lot.

Get rid of all complications in your life. Yes, simple is beautiful.

Learn a new thing everyday. Keep ‘growing’ your brain by challenging it. By learning. Discovering.

There is no such thing as the past or the future. Live for now. That’s all we’ve got!

Make sure that the things you love are part of your daily life. Your dog, your grandchildren, music, flowers and all the other wonderful things. Take long walks in nature.

Cherish your health. Do what it takes to preserve or improve it.

Love

So you want to market and sell your services. Here are a few things I’ve discovered in the past little while about selling my services…Perhaps you will gain some insight about your own marketing practices?

1. You have to find the best place to meet potential clients. To me, that means networking and getting out there. Showing an individual what I can do for them is easier than finding new clients. You have to be imaginative and show up at the pertinent places at the right time. Find that new person who is willing to listen. The rest comes easier.
2. Understand your niche. That completes the comment in the previous paragragh. If I want to find clients for my life and business coaching, I will probably be wasting my energy networking in settings which don’t match my service offer. Fish in the appropriate pond.
3. Get your relationship with money straight. Money is nothing more than what you get in return for helping someone get what they want or need. Zig Ziglar said that you can get anything you want by helping other people get what they want and money is merely a certificate representing services rendered to others. So help somebody and get a reward in return. Go into a relationship with a client minded in this way and you will both come out satisfied and rewarded.Win/Win.
4. Find a friend or contact to warm up a prospective client. Ask your contact (who knows the prospect) to call and set you up with an introduction. That’s the best way of finding new clients. Professional marketing experts know this implicitely.
5. Get referrals from your clients. You’ll have to ask them for referrals. That maybe requires that you crawl out of your comfort zone. But the outcome is worth it. A referral is THE BEST WAY of finding new clients. If you don’t ask for referrals, you may want to consider moving to a salaried job.
6. Learn to enjoy the rush of selling. Your prospects want to see and feel passion and commitment from you. So, express it. The challenge of finding a person who you want to build a professional or business relationship with is exciting and motivating.
7. Get to know your prospective client. Ask the person questions to get to know them. What are the interests, values, motivations and goals of this person? Is this a person you want to do business with? How can you best help them to achieve their goals? How can you give them value in return for your services?
8. When you meet a prospective clients, experts tell us that you have 2 to 3 minutes to let them decide whether they want to do business with you. So, learn to earn somebody’s confidence quickly!
9. The key: build relationships. Center yourself on the other person. Create rapport. Ask questions about his/her family, work environment, plans, and so forth. It is a formula that works and that will always provide results.
10. Network: Once you know your niche, go to places where your ideal client can be found. Join a club; a gym, a volunteer organization. Whatever matches up with your interests and aptitudes. Eventually, the people you meet will ask you what you do…and you’ll be more than willing to share that with them.
11. Never take NO personally. Treat your maketing like a game. Lighten up! People can say no and you can learn from this, refine your pitch and approach for future clients. You learn the most from feedback you get from others. You become wise and refined in your approach.