Positive Psychology: A breath of fresh air…

Carol Kauffman is an Assistant Clinical Professor and Co-Founder and Director of the Coaching and Positive Psychology Initiative at Harvard Medical School.  Ms. Kauffman elaborated upon some highlights of Positive Psychology in a dynamic presentation made to coaches attending the Montreal ICF conference last November in Montreal. Dr. Kauffman spoke of Positive Psychology as ‘the science at the heart of coaching.’

Known as the scientific study of happiness, Positive Psychology is an emerging field. The movement was founded some years ago by Martin Seligman, a past president of the powerful American Psychological Association. The goal of Positive Psychology is to identify and maximize the use of an individual’s positive psychological traits rather than improving or correcting any negative flaws. Positive Psychology speaks of mental health rather than mental illness. Whereas the traditional psychological paradigm focused on pathology, victimology and mental illness, Seligman’s contribution (some call it a revolution) was to begin to identify characteristics and strategies of individuals with positive outlooks.

Seligman affirmed a person’s power of choice and capacity to make positive decisions in life. Not only did he manage to open up Psychology to new possibilities, more importantly, he based his findings firmly on the basis of scientific research. By doing so, he challenged the establishment and created a whole new way of understanding people. He literally changed the way many people view Psychology. Seligman’s questions:

    Can there be a psychological science that is about the best things in life?
    Can there be a classification of the strengths and virtues that make life worth living?
    Can parents and teachers use this science to raise strong, resilient children ready to take their place in a world in which more opportunities for fulfillment are available?
    Can adults teach themselves better ways to happiness and fulfillment? (Authentic Happiness, p. 29).

His answer to all these questions was a resounding, yes!

The relevance of this emerging science to professional Coaching is obvious.  Positive Psychology provides a robust theoretical and empirical base for the practice of life and executive coaching. The goal of any coach is to help people become aware of and live out their full potential. Not only can such a body of knowledge supply a scientific underpinning, but it provides a much needed methodology and knowledge coaches can use to help individuals and to inspire them to focus on their strengths, thus living out their potential. By integrating and applying the principles and the teachings of Positive Psychology in their practices, coaches can better motivate, manage and empower their clients to set and meet their personal goals and to live happier and more fulfilling lives.

One of the main approaches consists of assessing, developing and utilizing clients’ individual character strengths. As attention is shifted away from pathology and pain (the traditional medical model focused mostly on pathology) and directed to the strengths, vision and dreams of the individual, the coach can then work with his clients to find out what ‘energizes and pulls people forward rather than what causes and drives pain and failure’. The choice then is to ‘follow this trail of dreams’ during the whole coaching process.

For the coaches wanting to learn more about this fascinating area of research and who wish to develop practical skills and insight on the subject of Positive Psychology, a good place to begin is Martin E.P. Seligman’s best-selling book ‘Authentic Happiness.’ (ISBN 0-7432-2297-0).

I attended a very interesting conference last evening given by Danielle Lapointe, a business coach who lives in la Ville de Québec.
Based on the work of a group of psychologists residing in the mid-west of the United-States, their philosophy stresses the fact that the client is the expert in his life and profession and that he possesses all the necessary tools to be competent and to succeed. Called Constructivism, this coaching trend is future-looking and stresses exploring the ‘possibilities’ instead of trying to ‘problem-solve’. “Problem talk creates problems; solution talk creates solutions.” In large, the Constructivist movement is inspired by developments in NLP. Where does the coach fit in? He is the partner who co-creates solutions with his client instead of trying to resolve and ‘fix’ problems. Milton Erickson had developed an approach which taught that the ideal way to help a client is to build on the ressources by helping ‘to direct him towards his own future’. Concretly, it is the difference between a coach carrying someone on his own shoulders (very uncomfortable for both parties!) as opposed to actually helping the client to discover where he wants to go and to follow him as he brings us there. The coach then acts as a person who leads his client ‘from behind’.

Problems drag us down or keep us in the past. Dreams and an approach based of discovering solutions propulse us towards the future and get us out of our boxes, our comfort zones, and also out of our limiting behaviors. When we create objectives, we begin creating a new reality.

A coach can help a client change his perspectives and his perceptions. He can assist the client in opening that space in his mind and heart in order to ‘create new possibilities and solutions.’

Benoit Jobin loves to cook and eat and he has gained a lot of weight over time. Happily, with the help of a weight loss group, he has lost a lot of the accumulated kilograms.

The sad news is that diets alone never work. My own life experience and my work with my clients have convinced me of this. Diets can help a person to lose weight temporarily. However, the kilograms will inevitably return if an individual doesn’t deal with other issues in his life.

What does work is making a major change in limiting beliefs. Humans are beautifully complex beings. The physical, emotional and mental energies are all connected. A person cannot just change one element in his life (e.g. the control of food intake) with the expectation of making a lasting lifestyle change. Emotional states affect appetite and behavior; and our physical health affects our emotional. What we eat and what we do affect both. Unfortunately, there is a tendency today to compartmentalize and to separate these energies. A person just can’t deal with his emotions or exercise regularly or eat in a healthy way. All three energies must be maintained simultaneously. Good eating habits, exercise and healthy emotions coupled with an empowering belief system must co-exist. Nothing else will work. That’s why we speak of having to decide to make a commitment to profound and lasting change in order to succeed. Individuals succeed in the battle of the bulge when they decide once and for all to make changes in three areas of their lives. This is the holistic approach.

The ideal approach for an individual seeking to find and maintain a healthy weight level is to partner and work with a coach who can assist him to explore and to discover what is lacking in his present approach. The key is to explore the road to a lasting and profound lifestyle change. We aren’t talking about major years spent in psychotherapy here. When a person “sees” and comes to understand that he can only maintain his healthy weight goals by choosing a holistic approach, then regular exercise, relaxation and maintaining healthy eating habits will become a truly satisfying way of life.With his coach, an individual can examine many areas of his life. Usually, a client will decide to choose new and empowering beliefs in order to accomplish his weight goals, replacing his old limiting negative beliefs.Since beliefs are self-fulfilling propheties, the client will make major breakthroughs when he learns to make new choices in life by choosing to create a whole new set of beliefs that will enable him to succeed!

At our very first session, a client (Robert-not his real name) informs me that he has been put on probation at work because of his unsatisfactory performance. “I’m a terrible procrastinator. I’ve always been like that but it seems that I have been getting worst in the last couple years. In fact, my supervisor told me that I had been passed over for a promotion because of this habit. In a way, I think my days are counted with this company. It scares the hell our of me because at 44, it won’t be easy to find another job that pays as well as this one. I don’t hate the work and I have made a lot of good friends in the company. And, if I get fired, how do I face my wife and family?”

During the session, I got him to describe what procrastination meant to him and what he got out of it (the positive intent or secondary gain behind the behavior). He wasn’t clear when he tried to answer the question. “I’ve tried to change my behavior in the past. I have made all kinds of resolutions.”

Procrastination isn’t an easy habit to kick because it always provides a secondary gain for the person. A secondary gain is a benefit one unconsciously gets from a particular behavior. But in this case, it is one that could eventually sabotage his career. With more dialogue and questioning, I tried to make Robert more aware the positive intention that was causing him to behave in this un-resourceful way. The goal was to create a small opening so that he could see what motivated him to adopt this behavior. Because our rapport had clicked from the beginning of our work together, he felt in confidence with his coach and this contributed to him being less defensive and willing to take a good look at himself.

“I think I am a procratinator because I have this thing with needing to do a perfect job in everything I undertake. When my boss asks me to prepare a report, I get it out eventually but I always have the feeling I could make it better or that my boss won’t like it. I can’t stand to face that. That really stresses me. What if he doesn’t like it? He won’t trust me with future mandates. I couldn’t live with that. It is like nothing I do is ever good enough.” His coach asks him if his boss has criticized him lately for his work. He say no. He rarely does. “I am my own worst enemy. I am always harder on myself than everyone else.”

“Procrastination is a coping mechanism to deal with internal anxiety resulting from one of these deeply embedded fears: fear of failure, of success, of losing control, of separation (losing another individual’s affection), or fear of attachment.” (Yuen and Burke, 2006)

So, how did Robert come to adopt procrastination as a favoured coping mechanism? It turns out that, in subsequent sessions, he came to better understand his behavior patterns. He fits the typical profile of a procrastinator. As it turns out, he is not very realistic in his time management. He procrastinates in some areas of his life but not in others. You could find him on the golf course punctually at 6 in the morning. No procrastination here.
“What would be a more productive behavior at work, asks his coach.” “What would happen if you duplicated the same state of mind at work that you bring to the golf course. “On the course, I only please myself. I don’t feel I have to please a boss.’ With introspection and more awareness, Robert realizes that he can work on his perfectionism. He can choose to adopt new behaviors that will cut him more slack where in counts, in his inner self. You don’t accomplish this in a short time span, but awareness is the first small step towards new, more productive and resourceful behaviors.

In a subsequent session, his coach asks him: “What could a couple goal-setting and time management courses do for you to help you confront and solve the problem?” “What other resourses (people and courses) could help you to be better organized in the future? “how would your boss react if you brought him a focused training plan that would help you acquire key tools that would make you a better employee?” “What other things could you do to improve your performance and to feel better in your job? How can I best support you in the coming weeks as you move forward?”

Robert began dealing with his issues systematically. Once he was aware of the problem, he could begin dealing with it, one small step at a time, in an orderly fashion. Once he understood that the positive intention behind his procrastinating behavior was really based on his fear of not pleasing his boss (who reminded him of his demanding father), he could work on changing his state of mind and confronting his work in a more realistic way. He stopped sabotaging himself. He stopped being so demanding on himself and was under much less stress at work. HR helped him get some short-term training and he even became an expert time manager in a short period of time. The last time his coach spoke with him, he had applied for a more senior post in his company. Robert is a changed man. He still has a tendency to procrastinate but he is able to talk about it and make fun of it. “What do you expect from a ‘perfect’ employee?…that’s right: perfectionism!”